|
|
|
October 16th, 2008
11:20 pm - WTF moment in my life
I was trying find a g/f
But i think it's better if stay single for awhile
The only two choices for me are bad
Keep my dick in a glass jar
Or having someone by side every fucking minute
They don't have a real reason for liking me
Outside of I listen to rap and r&b
What else is there nothing but shit
On one end I can't talk to another female ever
The other this chick wants me to support her
They really wouldn't get along with people that i would hangout with
And I wouldn't get along with theirs
What the fuck
I wishing they would stop wasting time
Just find another sucker .
|
August 27th, 2008
01:43 am - Laying here
So I am laying here
With a view of 200 degree
I mostly everything
My hearing is better
I can hear my heart beat
I can still hear the bass of the car
2 blocks down the street
So I am laying
Looking at my cats
Looking for some rats
So I am lying here
Looking at soccer
And see a dumb youtube video
Here mate take this shot
You'll be floating for an hour
So i am move with out getting up
So I am laying here
With sun my eyes
The wind blowing through hair
Laying without a care
While the rest of the world look at me odd
I'll be here awhile
Just look for the mate who floating
For the next half and hour.
|
August 26th, 2008
02:41 am - I am still
I am still that little boy
Waiting to see if his dad comes
The unknown object
Him, my mom and me
My days of being an only child
Would soon be in the pass
But that day never came
I am still the 11 year
Who went up to willow grove and
Failed the 6th grade
What would have happen to my life if I passed
I was popluar for once
Then again i wasn't
I never talk to them outside school
So I wasn't popluar at all
I am still wondering if i had went to a non-black school
Would i have gone to parties
Have bunch of pics
Could have friends to talk outside of school
I am still that boy
Living in his past
But not showing
Because he not worry about the peresnt.
|
August 24th, 2008
08:27 pm - iDk
She walk slow down the avenue
I anit meet her but i get when I do
The time that I lie waiting
5 mins seems like an hour
An hour feels like days
Days feels like forever
Could things turn out different if i meet you earlier
Would it change if i meet you somewhere esle
Just wondering
My timing on thing I really want is bad
It's seem's like i am always a few months late
Time that i can't make up
People told me that it would find me once i stop looking
What happen if i can't stop
will she walk down the avenue
i guess i wont notice her
I notice people are saying
they need the other half
cookie and cream
cream to coffee
chocolate to milk
corona and lime
is it that hard
to find someone you can stand
|
August 22nd, 2008
12:08 am - This is not the hard goodbye
I don't hate to say this
I am sorry
I am sorry for ever coming across you
I'm sorry for wasting your time
You're willing to meet someone you just meet
But you're not willing to meet me
When i talk to you
It's feels like the cold dry winter
no snow
the wind slashes at your face
if you fall down with some skin showing
you might lose some skin
I am saying sorry because I mean it
No because you feel bad
Because you got to say something
If it was true
You should have do something to make me believe
This anit the hard goodbye for me
Because I am hard to replace in your eyes.
|
August 21st, 2008
02:05 am - Ska
There a ska horn melody playing in my mind
I walking down the street
I seen someone that i went school
Should I stop or keep on walking
I feel like i can cook something good today
I wonder how much snapper is?
But at this moment
I wanna jump up down
lose all my cares
you said u want to meet me
but you never make an effort
I want smash our memories in pieces
I want forget that
I ever came across.
I am happy now
you can't make sad
You know soul
I really don't care
The horn is playing well
I am saying fuck you
wave a flag around and around
each round for time i spend on you.
|
August 18th, 2008
07:47 pm - Why so serious ?
Why so serious
Is it bright where you are
Cause you're making it dark on mines
Then I'll make it dark for both of us
You'll want to leave but you can't just cut me
I want you to cut me off like i will to you
But you can't once you understand me
Why so serious
You want a serious man
I am serious
Sure I don't have my own place
Still depending mother
Leaving my job without one line up
I left before it got worst
I got the last laugh
I am serious
I don't pay a lot bills
I don't go through the same stuff as you
Why so serious babe?
You're willing to let that
Have a big effect on us
Your kid does not even live with you
He or she is not in the same zip code or state as you
Oh I'm so serious
I don't drive, I don't need to
I don't live on my own cause i don't need to yet
You rarely seen me lost it
Depend whats around if there no knives
I become and enrage person
Something like the hulk
With the knifes i doubt if i use
Why so serious
Come on
I would like know
What happens to you when you lost it
What changes in you
Will we still be around after the afterward
The rage inside of me wonders
Current Mood: ![[mood icon]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/mood/classic/smile.gif) calm
Current Music: Smashing Pumpkins - The beginning is the end is the beginning
|
August 17th, 2008
12:21 am - Trying to stay selfless
I'm trying to say selfless
I'm trying to find a way
To be selfless but a little bit selfish
For me to stay comfortable
I thought I could hang out all the time with my friends
But at times I feel like i am 20 going on 30
After october my friend will be a marry man
In december he will be a father
My other friend i don't know his plans
What are my plans
I wanna drink
I wanna go out to clubs
Get into random stuff
But it don't seem like i will be doing that.
My current peers are settling down
But I am 20 do I really want settle down?
Have kid maybe a wife.
I always pick the wrong time to be selfish
But it's better for my friendships if I say selfless.
An only child who selfless should not work
I make it work but it don't help me in the long run.
It don't help my heart or soul
I think i need some help.
|
August 15th, 2008
11:20 pm - Peom
It's friday night
I am not urging to get out of my apartment.
Normally it's gets me around 1 o'clock
"Walk on by" by the great Issac Hayes is on repeat in my mind.
Olympics on my tube 24/7
I had to leave a some people along.
The first few lines of walk on by plays in my head when i think about them.
" If you see me walking down the street, and i start to cry everytime we meet.
So Walk on by"
When I leave people alone for good, i try to meet someone new to replace them.
But timing is not on my side. Don't have a replace to lean like my job.
The friends who i do i have i am not trying to annoy.
What an odd day for me but a good one.
My mind has not play the crazy beat of drum and bass
The anti-gravity world of my mind make me think a party is going on
I don't see the hues of my black and blues that make me feel at home
I feel like i'm home but my eyes still close and don't know where I'm going
I'm on my own not like a rolling stone
I'm outta ideas for now lol.
|
04:46 pm - The "utopian" groups
I notice, with the african american who like anything that is not the stereotypical thing. They try to make little clicks and groups. These groups are suppose to be an outlet from the world. But no one can escape drama or bullshit. All you can do is try to minimize. I like to drink for awhile i used to drink to faded away. Just like everything in like I have to grow up. I drink for a relaxing feeling with my friends. I have found friends that we can turn away from the world if it piss us off. I know people who don't drink and really don't like people who do. But if u meet a b/f, g/f or good friend. There always that error, that double standard you and I have to make. Mines is drink and I have a tend to be an asshole. Now i like drinking even though i nearly killed myself. Yea I nearly killed myself cause of my favorite habit. But utopian groups don't exsit but near utopian that does to accept the flaws and the drama and bullshit will come. Deal with as best as u can but if the group of people is not a bunch of pussies. One last thing Don't ask people to join if u do make up group you'll only bring unwatnted people.
|
August 14th, 2008
11:27 pm - Manifesto II
I wanna get my manifesto on
I don't know what that word means but it sounds cool.
The Alfa chapter is close, but beat of drum and bass plays in my head.
I went back there cause I told them I would.
I didn't miss the place or like being in there, I hate it
Now lets start new chapter a new unknown chapter.
The booze of the blinding by the lights are in the distance.
I wanna boarden my culinary knowledge
I would like to see D.C from a different view
Really don't need someone to say me
But if u know misery, i wouldn't mind to hear yours.
|
11:25 pm - Wonder
This past weekend, I found happiness with sadness
I found my hard work for thing does not have any results
My mind wont let me think for the better
Only the real
I feel like I should faded way
But i have to where to faded to
I pissed off people which i didn't mean to
Now I can't even tell them I am sorry
I feel like crying but nothing will come out
I would like a new start but i will end up in the same situiton.
I wonder across my friends lies
I seen his easy life
I work hard
I life seems better with a drink in my hand.
I can't get drunk, can't get a buzz
I can't turn my brain
I am not looking for answer
I am looking for sometihng to change my life
why bother and I'm always the last choice
Right now Fading away is not the best thing
If i do that i am not coming back
|
April 2nd, 2008
11:52 pm - Is it too?
Is it too hard to tell some one how you feel.
Is it that hard not for me it's not. I am not normal I am far fucking normal
I work in a stressful industry and i love it. If you don't like it call me tell me face to face i hate text messages AHHHH.
Current Mood: ![[mood icon]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/mood/classic/angry.gif) angry
|
March 31st, 2008
11:52 am - The Drunk really cares
The guy who i have to work with on sunday always comes in with a hang over and is most of the time late. For the past two weeks he been showing up on time and on certain dishes he a hard ass on me. We talk got to know each other better and we talk about the restaurant seen in philly and come to find out alfa is the first place where he worked at where there was another black line cook. I knew when i came in the industry it would be like that.
|
March 30th, 2008
01:06 am - shortest realtionship ever
I would think knowing a girl for two years would work out to be a good g/f. Man was I wrong. I think when a girlfriend ask you what you are doing this weekend. you would think she would want to spend sometime with you. Not this chick she rather get high with her friends than spend time with me and tell me she will call me but never does. So friday i go bar hopping with my friends and the bartenders said fuck her. I belive it she was gettiing her hair done and still didn't call me back. Well I hangout with people that i could have spend with her. well her lost and wait til my co workers her about this.
|
March 18th, 2008
09:18 am - hell week final part
Saturday ( the hell day): I went into the restaurant at 11 am when i could have came in at noon. Chef and John was already there since 9 preping the chicken for the fundrasier that night. I started blanching what potatoes that i could turn into french fires. The third person of the group ron didnt show up yet. I was not surpise since he had the day off and he spends his days off getting drunk. So him being there at 9 was along shot. Also his friend who I was going to work the line with was suppose to come in at noon. Both of them came in at 2 pm. The chicken wings came so i could blanch them off because last nite the cooked 50 pounds of wings. The guy who i work with on the line is a real asshole when it gets busy. Before the chef left he told me not to quit. We got the prep done before service but when five o clock hit. We got orders left and right straight crazyness making good food for 8 hours the was some bumps and i did get a lil light head but with my drinking water after that mad crazy i made throught. Cleaned up my station wrote the prep list for tomorrow and left at 2am.
Sunday : Normally the guy never is there at 3, but he was there i bang out most of the prep by 5 we was talking about each other night since he was at the fundrasier last nite.we got some orders it was dead night i wanted it to be since i been working my ass off. i got the rest of the lil stuff i need for prep. we joke around acted dumb cause everyone was tired.he got a late rush in at 12:50.. i clean up and left at 2:00 a,
|
March 15th, 2008
09:38 am - hell week part 2
Thursday: shockingly was pretty easy. i was out the kitchen by 5:30 but i knew i had to roll mac tots witch take 2 hours to do. I had a feeling i was going to get screwed tomorrow.
Friday: I was right there was alot of stuff too prep and i read an item wrong so i had to prep cook wings right before service. Some how i mange to get most of everything done by 6 i went to make mac tots. but tonight everyone wanted to eat so food was flying out fast. they ran outta bread so i had to stop making mac tot and cover the salad station. and refill everyone up. after i was done the mac tot i start making more shrimp for the tempura. I made the chow chow, jicama salad and cut up the blacken chicken.i was only suppose to work 8 hours i did 10 hours lol. The only way i kept going was because i was drinking red bull since 3 in the afternoon. But tomorrow is going to be a longer day.
|
March 13th, 2008
09:53 am - Re cap of my hell week
For some odd reason i been doing alot of hours at my job. i dont mind it but it's just odd that i can get all these hours.
Sunday : I came in at noon and roll crab tots it took me two hours then i bang out the rest of the prep. and work my normal line shift. On sunday I did 13 hours straight.
Tuesday i was suppose to come in at 3 but the guy who normally work the prep shift need the day off so when the chef called me i was willingly going to do it. Was I going to do tell the chef no. Instead of coming in at noon he told me to come in at 11. Then During dinner service. A 10 top came in ( in restaurant slang 10 people came in). We bang out the dishes but a fillet mignon and stuffed chicken came back both half eaten, the customers saying it's over done. The rest of the night was steady. I did manage to get some prep done.
|
February 29th, 2008
10:01 am - I think i found good place to get better in
I am at my third week working at Alfa Bar and Restaurant in downtown philly. Good food, good people the chef i am always learning about the knife skills to food cost and labor staff. I like it there I actually look forward to go to work even if i have to come in on my day off i would not mind it would just be more money in my pocket lol ^_^.
Current Mood: thankful
|
February 23rd, 2008
12:19 am - She told me thats she gay
She told me that she is gay
she thinks i am trying to get with her
I know it and she told me it's a turn off
But she cute and where I am in life
I don't care don't wanna try
To turn or bi or straight
Let me chill with her and if she changes
It will be with out any input from me.
|
|
|
|
|
|
LiveJournal.com |
![[info]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif){kind=small}
obewankenknowbe's journal